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The Rothsteinism Poem Anthology

There’s palpable buzz in poetry.

NCAA Basketball: Texas A&M CC at Wisconsin Mary Langenfeld-USA TODAY Sports

If you’ve been on social media at all today, your feeds have likely been filled with poetry both romantic and not. Being a big fan of self gratification online, I decided to join in on the fun with one of our favorite topics: Rothsteinisms.

Our staff is very fond of “Rothsteinisms” — if you are unaware of Rothsteinisms you can catch up here — so we put together a collection of poems in his honor. Enjoy.

“Thing of Beauty” by Russ Steinberg

At Mid-Major Madness
We work with Chris Schutte
I’d rather watch Virginia basketball
It’s a thing of beauty


“Life Altering” by Chris Schutte

Vermont is on a roll
And definitely isn’t faltering
But they don’t have anything on TSA Precheck
Which is always life altering

“Palpable Buzz” by Russ Steinberg

Gonzaga is perfect
No matter what anyone does
There’s joy in Spokane
And a palpable buzz

“10-day Trip” by Chris Schutte

VCU has a penchant for excitement
And their home court can cause quite the stirrup
That’s what makes the Siegel Center
More life altering than a 10-day trip to Europe

“Death, Taxes, ...” by Russ Steinberg

No Big Ten in the top 16
But God love ‘em they’re tryin’
There are just three things they’re missing
Death, taxes, Bo Ryan

“March” by Chris Schutte

It’s the best month of the year
So don’t let your hoops thirst parch
Find a good seat on your couch because
This. Is. March.

“Stockbroker” by Russ Steinberg

Marcus Keene does great things
We have no idea how
But the Eagles look good
So buy stock now.

“Brutal” by Chris Schutte

When a team loses a buy game
It doesn’t seem like reality
These Davids beating Goliaths
Is the epitome of brutality.

“The Caravan” by Russ Steinberg

This may seem mean
But really we love Jon
So know while the dogs bark
The caravan marches on

If you have a Rothstein-inspired poem to share, feel free to share it with us on our Twitter page or in the comment section.