clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

Rick Stansbury is playing 4-D chess

Look at God.

Mississippi State Bulldogs v Arkansas Razobacks Photo by Wesley Hitt/Getty Images

Rick Stansbury is the best coach in the country.

I don’t care how ridiculous that sounds. He’s making moves that should make your head spin and he’s doing it at Western Kentucky. There has been, and will be, plenty of ink spilled about his stupid good recruiting. It’s truly astonishing. His 2017 class checks in at ninth best in the country, highlighted by future leviathan Mitchell Robinson, No. 2 JUCO recruit Jordan Brangers, and another top 60-recruit in Josh Anderson. That in itself is grounds to build a statue.

But Stansbury doesn’t stop there.

Western Kentucky announced Monday that Justin Johnson, a rising senior and the leading scorer on last year’s basketball team, is going to play tight end this fall for the football team. That’s good and cool! Johnson is a 6-foot-7 load who checks in at 240 pounds. That build at tight end is going to give linebackers fits. It would be cool if Johnson, already a great basketball player, became also a great football player.

But look a little closer. Johnson is now a football player. Which means he’s on a football scholarship. Which means one more open spot on the roster.

Rick Stansbury is going to turn that scholarship into another stud because he’s Rick Stansbury. And guess what? Justin Johnson is still going to play basketball this winter, he’ll just do it as a walk-on.

This is next level stuff.

We already knew Stansbury is one of the most feared names on the recruiting trail. But what this latest news shows is that Stansbury is no longer limited by scholarship counts, rules of thumb, or classical physics. No, Rick Stansbury is on that quantum mechanics flow and he wants you to get on his level.

Here are some future Rick Stansbury headlines that will be coming across your timeline in a not too distant future.

“Entire Western Kentucky Basketball team to play baseball, USA U-18 Basketball roster commits to the Hilltoppers”

“UTEP to become vassal state of Western Kentucky, promises two scholarship players a season in exchange for protection”

“Rick Stansbury promoted to Western Kentucky Athletic Director, hires a reanimated John Wooden as head coach of men’s basketball program”

“Rick Stansbury elected governor of Kentucky; Kentucky Senate passes bill banning collegiate basketball outside of Bowling Green”

“2024 Election Tracker: Stansbury clinches 270 electoral votes, is new President of United States”

“President Stansbury signs executive order reallocating NCAA Men’s Basketball championships to Western Kentucky Hilltoppers, critics cry foul play”

“That weird Western Kentucky University amorphous blob mascot thing named new Supreme Court Justice, end nigh”

It’s unavoidable. We are all living in Rick Stansbury’s world. It’s time to paint your face red and welcome your new college basketball overlord.